How baffling, this blindness of his, for someone so ambitious.
With today’s chapters, we jump into a new perspective. What did you think of being in Zikora’s mind? How did you find it in comparison to Chiamaka’s perspective?
Why do you think Adichie chose to compare labour to a plague from the Old Testament?
It is not often that writers detail the labour of childbirth. Why do you think Adichie chose to tell us?
Having read from Chia’s perspective and about her love life, Zikora seems to have had a bit more luck than Chia. In Kwame’s parents, Zikora has found family unlike her own. While Chia seemed to struggle to find someone to build a life and home with Zikora didn’t/ What other comparisons do you think Adichie is drawing between the two women?
Much like Chia, Zikora is also plagued by the weight of getting married and settled before its too late. Although we could clearly see that the pressure of getting married was placed there by Chia’s family, Zikora’s pressure seems more internal. Do you think we will see this same theme in the other two perspectives we will get in Dream Count?
The theme of the book has a lot to do with dreams. Chia struggled to wholly achieve her dreams. Every time she seemed close; things did not go the way she had hoped. In Zikora’s chapters her dreams are placed in the hands of prayer and religion. Do you think we will finish reading from Zikora’s perspective and see her dreams not actualised? Both Chia and Zikhora need to rely on other people in order to achieve their dream. Do you think most dreams and ambitions rely on other people?
We know that she does have a child, but do you think that if her dreams are actualised, they are in a way that is not expected by Zikora?
Most people can relte to Zikora’s failed online dating attempt. This situation seems to highlight that despite all the advancements we’ve made as a society, we still seem to lack connection. Do you feel the same? Or do you think that Zikora should’ve continued to try online dating? Do you think online dating is faithless?
What do you make of Zikora labelling her next two partners as timewasters?
The first of timewasters seems to be both progressive and traditional. As Zikora states, he seems selective on his progressive nature. What do you think of his conversation around having children? First, he questions Zikora’s fertility and then her mother’s and then suggests that should they have children, it would be without the help of nannies.
Zikora avoids conflict. The only exception is with Omeloger but even then, it does not surpass bickering. Zikora seems to leave and avoid when things become difficult for her to swallow. Why do you think she does this? She avoids it in a personal and religious capacity.
Why do you think Kwame didn’t reveal to Zikora that he didn’t want children? What do you think of when Kwame shifted the blame of the break-up onto Zikora?
Do you think Kwame will return?
Although Zikora always thought of pregnancy has a team event, Kadiatou shares comfort that the baby is her own. Do you think this comfort will change how Zikora views her pregnancy and her future child?
7 responses to “Dream Count – Day Three”
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1. The author does such a fantastic job of giving both women their own voice that the change in perspective was quite noticeable. Zikora’s struggles are interesting and unlike what we’ve heard from Chia. They both want connection and partnership, but their ultimate goals are different. I did not relate to Zikora as much as Chia, but her thoughts and views are valid. She broke my heart a little bit more.
2. A plague ravages and rages against its host. Zikora’s difficult birthing experience felt to her like something uncontrollable that she did not bring onto herself not deserve. The Old Testament reference might be about how primitive and traditional childbirth still is. Despite modern medicine, the pain is inevitable, just like in the OT.
3. Childbirth is often glamourised with cutesy laboured breathing, supportive partners and blissfully sweat-soaked new moms. Adichie lifts the veil on this, and shows us that the glossy sheen is only skin deep. Labour can be difficult and unpleasant – this is not unique to Zikora.
4. Zikora is more certain of her needs and even her romantic missteps are understandable. Z is not as affluent as Chia and holds to a more traditional view of relationships and homemaking: she wants the “white-picket-fence” family structure and she wants it now, as evidenced by her breakdown on the phone.
5. No, I don’t think the same pressures will be experienced later. Kadiatou and Omelogor seem to have different struggles that lend more depth to the novel.
6. I believe there are two types of dreams: internally- and externally-motivated. Not every ambition needs an audience or a team.
7. Zikora’s dream for a family included a husband and children. Having one without the other was unexpected, but I believe that she will still appreciate one over the other.
8. I haven’t tried online dating, but I think the stigma attached to it has slowly dissipated. I believe every individual can decide on connection: for some, screens are enough while others still require a physical connection. This doesn’t necessarily make it faithless, just confused. It’s a bit like fast-food vs a hearty home-cooked meal, where one is more convenient, but with some limitations. Having said that, I don’t think Z should have continued with online dating after her failed attempts.
9. Zikora’s timewasters added no value to her life. She has always known that she wants marriage and children and pursued relationships with that goal in mind. Both men were not suitable for marriage and certainly not family!
10. This man is very backward! He expects proof of fertility before commitment, even bringing generational birth patterns to the forefront. Sadly, some men (and women) still think this way. If your mother had a low birthrate, then the same fate will befall you. This is incredibly sexist as women are now responsible for how many children they bear! (A bit accurate for Z’s mother, honestly) His suggestion of Z being a stay-at-home mother in the economy is laughable.11. Some people are not good with conflict. It’s not a personal flaw. Choosing to walk away rather than fight could be a defense mechanism: a way to protect her peace. It could also be a self-esteem issue. Her rift with her mother, and especially her internal dialogue when it comes to her, shows us that her avoidance is a choice – like an ostrich burying its head in the sand. Sometimes it is good to just walk away, however she doesn’t seem to get any closure from it.
12. I really don’t know why Kwame didn’t tell Z he didn’t want children – he seemed so honest and trustworthy, with a good family. His blaming Zikora for their breakup was surprising, considering how much she avoids any conflicts at all cost. Sadly, his parents didn’t know her well enough to realise this.
13. No I don’t think Kwame will return, nor do I want him to! He seemed perfect, but his inability to support Z is annoying. I don’t think he is deserving of her.
14. Kadiatou has a wonderful, close relationship with her daughter (and teenagers are notoriously difficult). I hope that Zikora also finds solace in their bond and realises that her child could be all she needs to fulfil her dreams of family.
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1. Zikora comes across as more of an emotional Chia
2. There was no escaping a plague, nor is there an escape from Childbirth, it’s happening and you just have to deal with it.
3. To remind us of the pain of childbirth and what Zikora was experiencing and feeling at the time.
4. The relationships they each had with their men. Zikora put more into her relationship with acts of service, Chia was more focused on her writing.
5. Yes I think we will.
6. No they rely on you and your choices.
7. Yes
8. Some people have had success, never having used it myself difficult to comment.
9. They both were longtime relationships without the result she wanted so the time and effort she put into the relationships she felt was a waste of her time.
10. Past experience of failed pregnancy, and if there was success it was important to him to have her be a full time mother.
11. She is a peacemaker, so conflict is difficult for her to deal with.
12. He is particularly responsible for her being pregnant and it’s easier to shift blame from yourself.
13. Only if he want to see the child, but at this stage unlikely.
14. Yes, she now has a child that will need her full attention, she can nurture the child which is one of her strengths. -
To some extent, I do think our dreams depend on other people. It really depends on what the dream is. As stated before its impossible to marry without another person.
Gosh, this is also a good question because sometimes we hope for something and we force its fulfilment and then we realise its actually a miserable success. It’s difficult to understand because we are taught to believe that these desires within us come from somewhere, so why are they not happening in the manner and timeframes that we want?
I am reminded of the experience of Abraham and Sarah, they had an earnest desire to have a son of their own, they were advanced in age and it seemed like an impossible dream. But it wasn’t because God did it in His time. I think we lack patience, perhaps that is why we are rarely satisfied with the lives we have because we are never fully in the present but are in the future or maybe even stuck in the past.
I think people who are avoidant don’t want to put themselves in situations that would result in discomfort. I think it’s a way in which she copes. I think it has its pros but ofc, it also has its cons.
The blame game is the cause of the state we find ourselves in as a species. It would be more shocking if he did the reverse.
I don’t think it will. If it is our unwavering belief that marriage or pregnancy should be x, it cannot be changed to y.
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1. They each have their own voice and personalities, but also some similarities, and thoughts about society’s expectations of women.
2. Biblical references is what Zikora knows, it’s fitting for her character.
3. She’s shedding light on the reality, not glamorising anything.
4. The way they grew up, how different they are, but despite being so different their friendship i slong lasting.
5. I don’t know, not necessarily marriage and children, but maybe other challenges or expectations women face.
6. I expect that their dreams and goals will evolve.
7. Yes.
8. I think she should do what she’s comfortable with. And faith is relative.
9. She’s pretty clear with her end goal and if it’s not being met, why must she wait around.
10. I didn’t particularly like his stance, he wouldn’t have liked it had the tables been turned.
11. She’s just not confrontational and would rather keep the peach and be liked.
12. It’s easier to shift blame than to take responsibility.
13. I hope not, I feel she may take him back to avoid conflict.
14. I don’t know.
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1. Truly the girlies are all going through it. In Zikora I see someone that definitely would know when she finds love and would do everything in her power to keep it unlike Chia. I do however think just like Chia Zikora also just has a thing for toxic guys that are just there for a good time not a long time.
2. To possibly show its intensity. Those that have never been in labour tend to think it’s not all that bad but truly it is (🤭😂not that I would know).
3. It’s something not spoken or appreciated enough. We live in a world that is so focused on the thrill of sex and cares very little about all that follows. So I loved that she shined some light on it and the importance of having a support structure throughout the journey.
4. Their take on marriage. One just wants to be loved and have fun the other really wants to find love and settle down. One wants a partner to do life with (more career support than any other part of life) one wants a partner to start a family with. One got to the stage of knowing the parents while one hardly dated guys that wanted the relationship to get there.
5. I hope not. I don’t like how as a society we’ve placed so much pressure on marriage and how it’s become that one thing that “as a women” you must achieve. I hope the other POVs show us life without longing for marriage I hope they show us that one can still be just as happy without being married. I’m all for marriage but it’s not the only thing there is to life.
6. Life in general is about community. It is rare for people to go about life alone and without the help of others.
7. I definitely think things did not work out the way she hoped but I can only hope that she will find happiness in her “new life”.
8. Personally I’m scared of online dating. I struggle to believe that any good can come from it. But I know a few people that have found solid partners there. I guess all I’m saying is …please be safe out there.
9. I think it’s rather sad that you’d be with someone and go for someone else similar and to the previous one. One “time waster” was enough but clearly maybe that’s her type. For me though I always feel that whether a real works out or not there’s always a reason certain people come into our lives.
10. I’m actually so confused I thought this was Kwame I didn’t realise that it was someone else. Now I must take back all the bad things I said about Kwame. I just feel like raising a child should be a two people thing and no parent should dictate how things should be done and in no way do you have the right to force someone to leave everything they want out of life and just focus on raising your child just because you don’t believe in Nannie’s.
11. She just seems like a non-confrontational person and I appreciate her for that. It saves you all the drama.
12. I think he really didn’t live and care about her because if he did that would be the first thing he communicated when things got more serious.
13. I think he will realise what a bad mistake his made and come back. But I hope he acts right if he does come back.
14. I think once the child is there it will make her happy and she definitely will see the bigger picture. -
1. An absolute joy—I found myself giggling and smiling throughout these chapters. Chiamaka’s perspective wasn’t boring per se, but Zikora’s has a lightheartedness to it. It’s amazing that the author made these narrating voices so different.
2. As someone who recently experienced labour, I completely understand the comparison—it really can feel like a curse, like God has turned against you. Of course, pain tolerance plays a role, but there’s a universal intensity to childbirth that makes the comparison fitting.
3. To make us sympathise with Zikora and understand her struggle rather than feeling sorry for Kwame if he ever decides to come back. By showing the raw reality of labour, Adichie ensures that the reader fully grasps the weight of what Zikora went through—alone.
4. Both women deeply yearn for love, but they express it in different ways. Zikora desperately wants marriage and children, while Chiamaka refuses to settle for anything that doesn’t come from real love. Their approaches contrast, but at their core, they’re both searching for fulfillment.
5. I hope not. I’d love to see perspectives from women who don’t care about societal expectations and aren’t consumed by the idea of marriage and men. It would be refreshing to see a shift in narrative.
6. In many ways, dreams do rely on other people. No one truly succeeds in isolation—we depend on connections, opportunities, and support. I’d love to see Zikora achieve her dreams, though I worry that might mean Kwame returning or another man becoming the key to her success. Her biggest dream seems to be making partner, though that hasn’t been deeply explored yet.
7. Absolutely. Life rarely unfolds the way we imagine, and I think Zikora will have to adjust to a new version of happiness and success.
8. Online dating can feel like a chore, especially with the risk of catfishing and insincere people. If it’s not working for you, there’s no reason to force it. That said, I wouldn’t call it faithless. It’s still a form of faith, just without the effort of going out and mingling in person.
9. The label is fitting. For someone who knows exactly what she wants, she still wasted time on men who clearly weren’t right for her.
10. It felt like he was testing her, as if trying to gauge whether she was ‘suitable’ to be a mother. It was manipulative and invasive—fertility is deeply personal, and the way he framed it was completely inappropriate.
11. Deep down, she knows that confronting people often leads nowhere. Her strained relationship with her mother might have conditioned her to avoid difficult conversations rather than push for resolution.
12. Because he knew it would crush her. Kwame is a coward—he wanted the benefits of their relationship without taking responsibility for the pain he caused. Instead of being honest, he let her build dreams around a future he never intended to give her.
13. I really hope not.
14. Definitely. Accepting that the child is *hers* will likely give her a sense of strength and independence. It’ll shift her perspective from what she lost to what she’s gained, helping her embrace motherhood on her own terms.
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1. I love it when authors are able to write multiple POVs where each character has such a distinct personality and way of thinking! Zikora and Chiamaka each shine bright as individual beings in their respective POVs.
2. I am not familiar with the Old Testament, but I imagine the reference works particularly well because of Zikora’s religious alignment.
3. I think Adichie chose to tell us EXACTLY BECAUSE it is not often written about! I found these passages painful, but refreshing to read. We need more books detailing the unglamorous parts of pregnancy, labour and motherhood. Not only is in insightful for those who have not experienced it, but it evokes empathy and/or commiseration.
4. Chia and Zikora have different expectations and desires from relationships. Chia’s is more of an idealist and romantic, while Zikora tends towards tradition, stability and belonging.
5. I think we will! This issue remains such a big pressure in our society, particularly in more tradition/culture-based communities.
6. I think it depends on what your dream is. Dreams can be big or small, and perhaps smaller ones (or even bigger ones) don’t need you to rely on others. Nevertheless, I hope Chia and Zikor get to fulfill their dreams. I am hopeful for their success.
7. It is obvious that Zikora did not expect this to be the way her dreams actualized. I hope she can make peace with this new, if unexpected, juncture in her life.
8. Honestly, I can’t say! This is once again a very subjective experience! Online dating works for some and does not work for others. I don’t think it is fair to call it entirely faithless. Many had and continue to have success through online dating.
9. With the end goal of marriage in mind, she feels that they “wasted her time” in achieving this goal. I believe her feelings are valid in this assessment.
10. This “timewaster” disgusted me with his thinking. I personally did not like him.
11. This is a difficult question to answer… Avoiding conflict is a very common coping mechanism and while not healthy, I can understand why she does it. I hope Zikora learns to develop healthy, nonavoidant conflict resolution skills. We cannot run away from our problems forever. Avoiding always causes more problems in the long run.
12. Perhaps he did not want to lose her. Zikora’s story about her relationship with Kwame is such a heartbreaking because it did feel like real love was there. However, Kwame was scared. And he too seems to have a tendency for avoidance (until it is too late)!
13. Hmm, I’m not sure. After what he has done, even if he does return, I hope Zikora does not take him back. Let him be in the life of his child, but Zikora deserves better.
14. I hope so. As her chapters progress, we can see how her tenderness builds and her mindset shifts. I believe she can find comfort in this sentiment.
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